How To Deal With An Insanely Jealous Girl
RE Blogged from askmen.com
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When a person is jealous,
it usually means he or she is insecure about something. If jealousy lurks inside the woman
you’re involved with, there’s a right way to handle it and a very, very wrong
way. Do the wrong thing and watch the crazy combust.I’ve done a lot of
crazy, jealousy-fueled
things I am ashamed of. Things that make me cringe when I remember that, yes, that was in
fact me and, no, I cannot take it back. I’d like to be able to blame it all on
hormonal imbalances caused by black market birth control some crack doctor forced on me,
but that would be a huge lie. All I have to blame are my insecurities and my lack of
control over them.If I have learned one thing in the last seven years and five
serious relationships, it’s that jealousy is just insecurity wearing a super-ugly
mask. Sometimes, it takes a lot of magic to remove the mask safely.As a
recovered jealous freak, I feel like I have a lot of advice that might help amateur
jealous freaks avoid becoming professional jealous freaks. I also feel like as a
recovering jealous freak who has had a lot of dating and relationship experience, I know
how best to handle a freak like me. And believe me, we’re everywhere. No matter who
you are, you’re going to encounter at least one of us along the way.I
remember one all-time low when I found out an ex-boyfriend of mine had taken home another
girl from a party we were all at. It was killing me that he was even there, and the fact
that he was avoiding me made it worse. When he left the party, I followed him home and
waited outside, then drunkenly threw rocks at his bedroom window until he had to open it
and shoo me away (naturally, I wasn’t going anywhere). Not only did I ruin his
chance at rebounding with a normal girl by forcing the attention to revert back to myself,
but I made myself into the thing I hated most: the crazy jealous ex-girlfriend.The thing about jealousy is that it doesn’t happen if you feel 100% confident, but
no one, not even Beyonce, is 100% confident all the time. What I’m trying to say is
that jealousy is almost inevitable. So huddle close, friends, and let me tell you how to
handle it.
The jealous girlfriend
The best way to deal with jealousy is conversation and logic. I know this can be
extremely hard when your girlfriend has pushed you to the limit of your sanity, but you
have to remember that she isn’t psycho, she’s just feeling insecure. Try to
think about why this might be. It’s OK to ask, but you have to do it the right way.
Take her aside, give her a hug and just say, “What’s going on with you? Is
everything OK?” Tone is so important here. There cannot be an inch of frustration in
your voice. Deep breath, OK?She might defensively react by putting the blame
back on you or on some girl you were talking to. She might cry. She might deny that
anything is wrong. Alcohol usually affects reaction. Is she drunk? Are you drunk? Will
having a drunken talk really be helpful right now? If you are both drunk, it’s best
to separate and talk about this in the morning. There is nothing wrong with that.
It’s the smart choice.