How To Tell A Woman She’s Bad In Bed
RE Blogged from askmen.com
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Not tonight, love.When you first hooked up, one look from the missus was all
it took for your engine to rev up quicker than a pimped-out ride from The Fast and the
Furious. You were, to put it bluntly, like a dog in heat, but those first throes of
passion are long gone, and your girlfriend has since lost her almost God-given power to
make you happy between the sheets.She may have seduced you with her looks and
charm, but if you’re dealing with bad sex months
after that first night of intimacy, then she might as well look like Whoopi Goldberg. Not
that you would tell her that. Unless you possess a heart of stone like Simon
Cowell, you’d feel pretty bad watching your girlfriend suffer a Bridget
Jones-style breakdown after telling her she’s failing miserably in the bedroom.But make enough excuses to avoid a close encounter or drop enough hints about what
she should be doing, and your girlfriend will eventually catch on. Here’s what to do
to if bad sex is ruining your relationship.
Rule No. 1: Fake an illness
Since the dawn of time, women have used phony ailments such as headaches and upset
stomachs to get out of having sex. But two can play at that game. If the stars have
aligned and the moon is in the right place, she might be feeling amorous and up for a
night of passion. You, alternatively, would rather sleep, watch sports or do almost
anything instead of enduring another night of passionless sex. It’s not you;
it’s her.Yawning at least once every few minutes should do the trick. If
that isn’t enough to ward off her advances, then make regular trips to the toilet
and proceed to groan loudly enough for your girlfriend to hear. She’ll soon be
colder than a streaker in the midst of a Canadian winter.
Rule No. 2: Be cunning
We’ve already established that you can’t just tell the missus how bad she is
in the sack. But a little scheming can go a long way. Ask her if there’s anything in
particular she’d like you to do when getting intimate. Not only does it make your
girlfriend feel special, but it also gives you an excuse to tell her exactly
what you want. Women love to talk, so use this to your advantage.Read on for
ways to let her know she’s bad at sex…